Missing

I hear you’ve been asking about me
You say I’m missing
Missing from the knowledge and comfort of being that consistent, reliable person you can depend on
So I guess from that perspective I am missing

Missing you being able to schedule me for the things you need done
Missing from your need to have my time meet your needs
Missing from you now having to figure out how to replace me because you will
Missing from knowing that I am only a number or a dollar or whatever to you

But what I am missing most … is My life
I am missing not having time to be still and know who I am
I am missing paying myself first so that all the things I want to do actually get done
I am missing the ability to sleep through the night because of all the things I keep thinking I have to do
I am missing from jumping through all the little hoops for everyone else while no one even sees the giant hoop they can just walk through for me

In fact … I choose to be missing right now
In order that I may be found by the One who knows exactly where I am
Because in Him there is no expectation that I should be at this place or that place or anyplace right now
In Him I don’t have to do this and that and that and that and still it never be enough

I am missing time with God
Missing the still small voice amidst all the loud clanging ones that just won’t seem to stop

I am missing Me
Missing being free to be Me

And you know what
I don’t like this missing person
Because missing me means missing the essence of who I am
The amazingness of what I can do and become
The incredible power of the Greater One who lives on the inside of me

Missing

Have you seen Me?